A text messages between me and my brother:-
Him : Bila nak pasang batu nesan ?- dah 40 hari
Me: hmm nantilah nak settle something sikit. Tak lama dah, no need to wait 40 hari or 100 hari, esok esok aku calllah Pak Batu Nesan.
Him: Ko ada g kubur?, aku belum pergi
Me: Ada, dah 2, 3 kali, pesal tak pergi, pergilah pacak pacak pokok skit bagi redup. Lecak kalau hujan, kena letak batu biji sikit tepi tepi tu
Him: Tah, aku tak rasa macam dia dah mati. Rasa macam ada ja.
Me: *terkedu*
That exactly what I feel. He is somewhere and he will come back. Call me now Pa, I ll fetch you from somewhere.
I thought I am getting over this. My mood is period mood and I am a bit depressed and sad these few days. Hati didalam mudah terkecik disini dan disana :). And the fact that he does not exist anymore make me sad. That reality hurts. You know that somewhere, somebody can be away for a day, a month or a year and you dont mind if you dont see him or her. Because He is around but when you know with certainty that person just does not exist anymore in physical form, that brings in totally different feeling in you. I feel normal most of the time but when that feeling sinks in, it penetrates deep into my heart like a very sharp knife cutting through my entire being ;(,dealing with death is certainly not easy :(
ya Allah ya Allah show me the way and make me strong - Ermayum.
13 comments:
dear, coping with death of loved one can be very difficult kan, pls be strong. Hugs. Banyak2 kita sedekahkan Al Fatihah ye.
Erma,
i tumpang sedih...
tak dapat i bayangkan perasaan you & your brother. semoga arwah papa & mother you ditempatkan di kalangan orang2 yg beriman, amin.
sedihnya saya baca..tersentuh hati.
dun be too sad ok.nanti saya pun sedih sama.
saya smalam,tetiba main2 dgn aleesya,tersayu lak hati..meleleh air mata.besnye kalu insan kecil tu ada bersama.tetiba terkenang.
emm..wpun sama2 kehilangan,tapi,saya tau,perasaan akak lagi dalam kan..
anak boleh adakan lagi..tapi,our parents,hanya itu lah satu2nya sepanjang hayat.
be strong k? *hugs*
Al fatihah..sedekahkan yassin tiap2 kali lps maghrib untuk ayah..
my ayah pun dah uzur...sedih jugak memikirkannya
*hugs
ermayum kuat org nye...
i pray for your strength kak..*me sedih*
Salam takziah....al-fatihah buat arwah...eynda dah lalui pengalaman macam ni...walaupun dah 10 tahun berlalu tapi adakala kenangan tu datang & rasa sangat2 sayu....so be strong ok...
Babe..I feel you...Its hard..its painful..I still can't get over him..sometimes rasa macam he just went somewhere for a while..Kadang pujuk hati sendiri that he will come back later2..but bila realize that he's not..thats the most hurting part..
kak, selamanya kita akan merindui mereka yg telah tiada kan? be strong k..
smoga mereka ditempatkan di kalangan org2 yg beriman.. amin~
akak n mak akak pernah rasa apa yg Eda rasa sekarang,..kami selalu nanges sama2 kalau teringat arwah abah..
Hi dear, I know how you feel and I think it's normal that kita akan selalu teringat but of course it hurts so much. Be strong always..ok
lady iye i know :)
ladylove thanks babe
ashra :) tetap sama sakitnya anak pun tak boleh ditukar ganti :(
pulut- iya insyaAllah
joy :) *hug*
maya thanks dear
eynda thanks dear
meen *hug* that part realization is the hardest yes
thanks Nur
azmiezas :(
TK thanks dear
dear... i had that same feeling 12 years ago ... when i lost my dearest arwah atuk (tp i panggil ayah) .. terasa2 macam dia ada .. betul, it's not easy ... be strong ye, semuanya pinjaman kan. bersyukur kita diberi kesempatan utk berkenalan, sayang dgn mereka2 tu kan. Ayah I pun uzur dah .. sedih gak bila memeikirkan have to go thru it again. masa tulis ni pun rasa nk nangis ingat arwah atuk i.
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