It just that death is too close at home you know, death of my mum, death of my dad - shockingly unexpected and it makes me think and it's scared me to death :) that I will go at unexpected time as well. And coincidentally, I stumble upon the previous post.
Do you know (by heart) that the whole world means nothing? All the materials things are just pure dust? Yet we require them (eg: money, education) and we must try our best to get them as if that we will be living forever. Just like my dad thought that he would live to the 100 years. Ambitious he was kan? My mum died young- at 56 years old - so if I follow the record set by my parents - I might die at the age of between 56 to 68 years old :). If I follow lah :)
Hmm , I have not completed my will yet but basically apart from who gets what
I want the people who I love and leave behind to move on. It is just that my time has arrived - dont dwell on "why" - just let me go . Nothing to be sad of - I just go back to see my creator. Just be happy for me. Dont be sad. I dont want you to stare at the ceiling in the middle of night and shed tears (Sadly, I do this once a while)
Feel free to tidy up my things
Feel free to sell off my jewelry or to trade in to the latest fashion and put it on (I dont know what to do with my mum jewelry)
Feel free to throw away my handbags, my phones, my laptop or whatever that I used
or I used to love if they have torn or no more functioning well. Dont keep them and live in clutter :).
Feel free to destroy all the photos - just keep a few for the memories - just dont throw them into the garbage- burn them please (I dont know what to do with beratus gambar and album that my parents left behind - ada yang dah koyak rabak and melekat lekat)
Feel free to donate my pinggan mangkuk to mosque or anywhere that it can become useful. Somebody suggest me this , but I haven not done it (for my mum's) - (you know sometime our mothers / (or us?? collect expensive silverware? :D) like to buy pinggan and periuk and pinggan and more pinggan :) so that they can use them during kenduri kendara- when they were young they didnt know that they will be many catering services or pinggan kertas :))
Feel free to give away my clothes to the needy or just burn them. Keep one or two is enough for the memory
Feel free to spend my money but please know that I save them for my (but now your) rainy days but yes please use some for shopping :). It is OK.
Feel free to re-marry :) yet make sure that my children are given the best and their hak (whatever belong to me is now belong to them) are protected :) monetary form of course heheh
I understand that each one of you have your own life, buy and collect your own things. I understand that we have different taste in jewelry, bags or fashions or whatever. You dont have to use mine and you dont have to keep all those if I am no more around. Let them go, donate, sell them off - my old shabby bike or old car, if they are not working anymore sell them as junk - if they are still working but you dont like them, sell them off as well. It does not matter if I love them to the bits - they are no more important.
Get rid of my things - just get rid of them - dont keep them and feel sad every time you look at them- clear them off your view
Just pray for me. Pray that Allah has mercy on my soul. Pray that I am forgiven of my sins.
Only you, my children - the ones who can recite Alfatihah for me - who pray and recite doa specifically for me. Only you, Er Ma Yum. Oh Allah , have mercy on my soul
I am scared. When death notion hits me- I just got scared (yeah, a minute later, I may forget again)
So just pray for me - you are all the greatest of children- no matter what you do, I am always your mum who loves you and you are always my children who love me (whether you want to admit it or not)
* Just a reflection of my little thought*
I ll make it easy for you all
Love
ESZ
ps:
Let 's include our prayers for our datuk nenek and the whole umat Islam who have passed away. At the end of the day, it is just us, you know, we who have to count on each other . So be nice, be good- Forgive those who have done us wrong. Just forgive them
And have faith that Allah is Maha Pengasih, Maha Penyayang and Maha Belas Kasihan. May Allah has mercy on all roh mak, ayah, atuk, nenek, moyang kita. Amin
10 comments:
dearie, i understand sgt sgt what ur writing about in this posting. i lost my very best friend and mom in the same year. my mak pun meninggal muda; she was only 46. another close friend of mine suffrd heart attack n almost died. so to me pun death comes swiftly and without warning. i dont think i can cry anymore if i hear about another death...kdg2 i'm so scared smapai when i look at my husband & kids sleeping, i wonder if i can see them in the morning (alive)...
al-Fatihah to your parents. we're strong. we will go on & sedekah byk2 doa for them. :)
Salams Erm,
As you may aware, we can provide du'a too for them, even there is no specific du'a for our anchestor, but I think they fall into the category of mukminin and mukminat. Please refer to the link that I sent you few weeks back.
Have an easy heart, Erm, insyaAllah, they are restful there, as long as they have someone like you who always recite and present them the zikr, selawat, al-fatihah, other good deeds. :)
akak pn pernah terfikir n berbincang benda2 yg sama dgn hubby tau..
tadik i click blog k.azmiezas..pun ckp psl kematian.. and i plak dah buat draft psl kehilangan, lom up lagik that entry... i takut hilang org yg dkt dgn i sbb i lom penah rasa.. rase tak bersedia tapi kalau ia terjadi, i kene face the fact dgn redha..
Heavynya topik hari ni. Once in a while terfikir gak pasal mati. Takut weh!!
Syigim yeah will be OK I know that thanks babe
Nur yeah I know that but sometimes it is still scary to be left alone - will others pray for us with the same hope and conviction like a son or daugther pray for his or her parents Nur ?:) insyaAllah :)
azmieezas we thought of the same thing this Friday kak )
maya when it happens it happens and you just have to go through it dear
unai :)sekali sekala heavy
Syigim yeah will be OK I know that thanks babe
Nur yeah I know that but sometimes it is still scary to be left alone - will others pray for us with the same hope and conviction like a son or daugther pray for his or her parents Nur ?:) insyaAllah :)
azmieezas we thought of the same thing this Friday kak )
maya when it happens it happens and you just have to go through it dear
unai :)sekali sekala heavy
Erma..
Lately ni pun i asik pikir tajuk yang sama. Meninggalkan orang yang disayangi dengan harapan pemergian kita diredhai, dan toksah la bersedih lama-lama.. Mengharaokan bahawa mereka mengingati kita sentiasa di dalam du'a.
That is part kita nak tinggal mereka.. Part kita nak berhijrahke alam baru juga is another big issue.. Kita nak bawak apa jumpa Allah.. Mati kita bagaimana, tragiskah, menyayat hatikah, mudahkah, akan lalukah harum mewangi syurga di saat kita sedang bergelut dengan saat nyawa dicabut.. Subhanallah.. Semoga Allah elakkan kita fitnah semasa hampir mati
I'm about to buat entry pasal ni.. Still belum lagi..
sedihnya kak entry..
speechless =(
I've been thinkin bout the same thing since my dear husband passed away.Rasa maybe lepas nie its my turn..takut if it is unexpected death jugak..Hopefully Kyra will remember me when its my time..cheday..:(
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